Carnival Season

Jaden watched the waves roll against the sand, crystal clear and sparkling in the sun. Kids frolicked in the water, giggling, splashing each other, while women in bikinis sunbathed without a care in the world. Another day in paradise. Another day to wonder why he was even here at all.

“Hey, I was asking you a question.”

Jaden blinked, tilting his head towards his brother Calvin. “Hm? Yeah?”

“I was saying I could eat and wanted to know what you were in the mood for.”

Jaden shrugged. “Hadn’t really thought about it. I’m good with whatever.”

“You sure you’re good? Because you’ve been walking around with that mopey look on your face since you came to the island.” Calvin sighed.

“Sorry man…Didn’t mean to put it like that. But all I’m saying is that you wanted to get away from all that shit back home and there are worse places to do it than Trinidad. So, how about we get a couple of doubles, a couple of beers and toast to you being back on the market?”

 Jaden found himself staring at a woman walking a short distance from where they sat. He couldn’t see her face. From behind she had the same dark hair and petite build as Monique. He’d been seeing her everywhere lately. “Sounds like a plan.”

 “Good answer. By the time this trip is over you’ll have forgotten all about whatshername.” Calvin punched his shoulder affectionately in the same way he’d done since they were kids.

Forcing a smile he didn’t feel, Jaden followed Calvin away from the beach, crossing the road to a street food market that catered to tourists and locals. Calvin got two bottles of Carib and paid for lunch as well. Sitting on a wall, Jaden bit into his doubles, spice flowing into his mouth. He washed it down with a few swigs of the beer.

“God. That tastes good,” Calvin said, demolishing his meal and licking curry sauce from his fingers. “I don’t care what people say. Trini food is the best in the world.”

“It’s up there for sure,” Jaden agreed, nursing his drink while gazing at the colourful decorations hanging from buildings. Carnival was fast approaching. A restless energy pervaded the streets, something to be released over the next two days. The perfect excuse to blow off steam, yet Jaden couldn’t bring himself to get hyped up. Not when all he could think about was the divorce. Six years of his life loving a woman he thought was his soulmate. Six years of convincing himself he was happy.

 When’d he found out Monique had cheated on him, the anger and the sense of betrayal had come. But they were soon replaced by a feeling of guilt. Had he not treated her well enough? Had he not done everything he could to make her feel safe and loved?

Even after all these months, there was a part of Jaden that still blamed himself and the only thing that made sense was to try and get out his rut, so he’d taken time out from his job and gone to Trinidad to visit his brother, hoping the sunshine and beaches would clear his head, only to realise that it didn’t make any difference.

“You’re thinking about her again aren’t you?” Calvin said. “I’m going to get us some more beers and then we’re going to find you a woman to wine on. That’ll sort you out.”

Not waiting for a reply, Calvin ventured back into the market. Jaden sighed and tried to distract himself by watching vendors serve food to the endless sea of tourists that milled in and out of the maze of stalls. One vendor was serving a doubles to a woman dressed in a crop top and flowery skirt and from the look he was giving her, he was imagining some pretty graphic scenes. It wasn’t hard to see why.

 The woman was gorgeous, elegant and striking, with high cheekbones and curvaceous hips that swung to their own rhythm. Several other men were checking her out and Jaden couldn’t help but shake his head at how obvious they were being.

He looked back to the woman to see if she’d noticed and saw her staring right at him. He rubbed his head, looking hurriedly into the distance. Calvin returned with more beer and motioned for him to follow. Jaden glanced at the stall one last time. The woman had gone.

Thirty minutes later, Jaden stood inside a tent, listening to a group of pannists drum up a storm. Their hands rattled against the steelpans, conjuring the music of the island, a flurry of beats that got the crowd into a good mood. As he swigged his beer, Jaden felt the music shiver through him and he swayed from side to side, caught in the vibes that shook the ground.

“Not bad, little brother. But you’ve really got to feel the rhythm inside you.” Calvin rocked backwards as if he were about to shimmy beneath an invisible limbo pole.

“Think you’re feeling it plenty for both of us,” Jaden laughed, happy to tap his foot in time to the frantic banging of the pannists.

When the performance ended, Jaden barely had time to clap before Calvin dragged him to a nearby rum bar that overlooked the beach. “So, here’s what’s going to happen. You and me are going to officially start your rum education by drinking as much of the top-shelf stuff as we can find.” Calvin said, getting the bartender’s attention.

 Six drinks deep, Jaden was feeling good. There was noise all around him, the language of people who were casting off all their fears and worries to live in the moment with each other. He leaned across the table and put his hand on Calvin’s shoulder and said, “thank you, man. I needed this.”

“Booze?”

“Yeah. But not only that. This feeling. This…I’ve not felt like this in a while.”

 “You can thank me by getting the next round in. Make it another double.”

     “That’s fair.”

 Jaden went to the outside bar, moving through the crowd to get as close to the front as possible. Halfway there, a woman turned away from the bar and they collided, her drink spilling everywhere. 

“Shit. I’m really sorry.” Jaden said, noticing the pink stain that was spreading across the front of the woman’s white dress.

 The woman raised her eyebrows. “Uh-huh. I hope it was worth it to get a good view of my chest.”

 Jaden wasn’t sure how to react and the woman smiled coyly. “Relax. I’m messing with you. I know it was an accident.”

Sighing in relief, Jaden said, “sorry again. I shouldn’t have been in such a hurry to get to the bar.” He kept his gaze fixed on her face. “I’m Jaden by the way. I think I saw you in the market earlier today. I mean not that I was spying on you or anything. I just happened to be looking in your direction at the time and you look familiar…” He trailed off, wondering how much more of an ass he’d made of himself.

The woman smiled again. “Nice to meet you Jaden. I’m Tanice. How about you buy me a drink and we start over?”

Jaden stroked his jaw. “Happy to get you a drink. Just don’t feel like you’ve got to make conversation with me. I’m sure you’ve got friends somewhere waiting for you.”

Tanice tilted her head. “Sure. They’re all around me. But I’ve been waiting for the right company to come along and it so happens that I’ve chosen the guy that soaked my new dress. So, you’re stuck with me now. That cool with you?”

Again, Jaden was caught off guard by the mixture of playfulness and seriousness in her voice. “Yeah. That’s fine. I mean, so long as you don’t mind hanging out with me and my brother for a while. I owe him a drink too.”

 Tanice’s dark eyes twinkled. “I love meeting family. You better be pouring some shots then.”

With Tanice leading the way, Jaden managed to navigate the sea of bodies that crowded the bar and ordered a tray of tequila slammers and three more rums. On returning to the table, Jaden noted the sidelong stare Calvin gave him as Tanice sat down.

 “So, I went for our drinks and came back with company. Calvin, Tanice. Tanice, Calvin.”

  “A real pleasure,” Calvin said. “The more the merrier. There are worse things that meeting the most beautiful girl on the island.”

  Tanice laughed. “How many times have you used that line tonight?”

  “You’re the first and last because if I said it to anyone else it’d be a lie.”

  Snorting, Tanice turned to Jaden. “Is he always like this?”

“Pretty much. Those lines are going to get worse the more he drinks. There’s still time to make a run for it.”

“Ignore my brother,” Calvin waved him off. “He’s jealous that I’ve got the lion’s share of the charisma in the family.”

 “You’re getting charisma mixed up with having no filter.”

The drinks arrived and Calvin focused all his energy on the shots. He raised his glass, all three of them downing their shots together. Fire scorched Jaden’s mouth and he saw that Tanice was already moving onto her second. She knocked it back with ease and went for her third, giving him a look that goaded him into finishing his next shot and going for the one after.

After the sixth shot, the world flickered in and out of focus and Jaden became aware of the music thrumming in his ears. It became louder and louder, rocking him into a state of bliss that carried him far away.

His senses returned in the form of a pounding headache. Jaden groaned, rolling onto his back to try and figure out where he was. A fan hovered over him. Calvin’s spare room. Jaden pinched the bridge of his nose, waiting for the headache to disappear. No luck.

He left his room and went downstairs, towards the sound of a boiling kettle. In the kitchen he found Calvin sipping a coffee.

“Good. You’re up. Drink this and have a shower. There’s big plans today.” Calvin made another coffee and put it down on the table.

 “What time is it?”

 “4PM. And in case you were wondering you look as shit as you’re probably feeling right now.”

 “That’s not at all what I was wondering but thanks.” Jaden said, sarcasm heavy in his voice. “How are you so fresh?”

 “Because I know how to handle my liquor. That was some party last night and we’re going to do it all again for Carnival.”

  The thought of more alcohol made Jaden want to wretch. He swigged his coffee to keep the queasiness down. “Think I’m going to sit Carnival out.”

“My ass you’re sitting it out. Carnival is the greatest show on earth and there’s no way I’m letting you mope when you’re on holiday. And you can forget about standing Tanice up.”

Calvin raised his eyebrows at the blank expression on Jaden’s face.“Damn. You really did black out last night. Tanice was all over you, saying she’d see you at Carnival, which I’m still trying to get my head around, considering she could’ve gone for someone like me. But when you tell a woman like that you’re going to see her again you drag yourself through broken glass and razor wire to make sure you keep that promise and I’m going to help you out with that.”

Jaden tried to think back to last night. A lot of it was fuzzy. He did remember talking to Tanice a lot and enjoying her company. He reminded himself again of why he’d come to Trinidad and that moment of clarity helped him make up his mind. He rummaged in his pocket and found a crumpled-up paper with the name of a bar. “I said I’d meet her at a place called Leroy’s for 7.”

  “I know. You kept on telling me on the way back last night.”

 “Before I go anywhere I need food and lots of it.”

 “Way ahead of you. Seriously though you need to hit the shower. They can smell you all the way to Tobago.” 

Jaden gave Calvin the finger and went to the bathroom. Blasting himself with hot water shook the heaviness from his mind and he dressed in a blue shirt and jeans.

After freshening up, Jaden went with Calvin to a nearby restaurant and filled up on Oil Down, a thick, hearty stew of dumplings, callaloo, breadfruit, salted pork and spices. It soaked up most of the hangover and by the time he’d finished, Jaden was starting to feel like a human being again.

Out in the streets, Carnival was in full swing. Revelers drank and danced in a never-ending train of bright costumes and masks. Jaden and Calvin followed the parade up the main strip and then turned off into the district of St James, arriving at Leroy’s for 6:30 PM.

“I’ll get the first round in. Give you some of that Dutch courage that helped you seem interesting to Tanice.” Calvin joked, moving to the bar before Jaden could think of a comeback.

Jaden shook it off and said that he’d find a place for them to sit. He managed to grab a small corner table near the dance floor and positioned himself so he could watch the door for signs of Tanice. As he waited, he mentally scolded himself for not thinking of getting her number. It would’ve made meeting a lot easier and served as a reminder for how out of practice he was with women in general.

“Waiting for anyone special?” A familiar voice snapped him back to reality. Tanice hovered over him, an expectant gleam in her eyes.

 “Uh, Calvin was getting a round,” Jaden said, taking in the view of her flowing silver dress. “Didn’t realise you were already here. You look great by the way.”

 “Thanks. You don’t look so bad yourself. And I wouldn’t worry about waiting for your brother. Looks like he’s already found his company.”

 Jaden followed Tanice’s gaze to see Calvin chatting to a girl who looked to be half his age. Typical. “You’re right,” he said. “But you know what they say about three being a crowd.”

Tanice nodded. “We should get some air. It’s too beautiful of a night to be cramped up with all this sweat and body fluid. Well, for a little while anyway.”

Jaden caught the suggestiveness in her tone and before he could start unpacking it, she was already walking towards the door. He got out of his seat and followed her outside. The evening air was cool on his skin, a welcome change from the heat of the bar. Tanice had stopped a little further on down the road and they wandered together, absorbing the sights and sounds of Carnival.

Tanice found a wall for them to lean against and she took a small flask out of her purse. She sipped it and offered it to Jaden. “It’s whisky. Good stuff too.”

 “Oof. That’s strong.”

“You reacted like that to the tequila too,” Tanice chortled. “How much of last night do you remember?”

 Jaden shrugged. “There was a lot of dancing and music. I’m pretty sure we were dancing for a while.”

 “Well, I don’t know if I’d call what you were doing dancing…”

  “That’s a low blow,” Jaden said, pretending to be hurt. “You’d be surprised at how much rhythm I have when I’m in the mood. I used to take popping lessons as a kid.”

“Now if I’d seen some of that we might have ended up spending the whole night together,” Tanice half-smiled.

 Jaden was about to reply when a procession of costumed characters jigged along the road across from where they were sitting. “How long have you been coming to Carnival?”

  “All my life. There’s an energy that can’t be felt anywhere else. The vibing. The feeling of freedom. It’s a time where the material and immaterial worlds collide, and people let their demons out.”

   “You make it sound more like Halloween.”

“Halloween is for children. Carnival taps into a much older magic. You see that crowd over there? Each of them is wearing the face of a spirit and conjuring its essence. That woman on the left. The one that’s wearing the wide-brimmed hat and white face paint is representing my favourite. La Diablesse. To some she’s a beautiful temptress.

To others she’s a witch who sold her soul and became a demon. Another story is that she was a runaway slave who found her freedom and inspired other girls to do the same. It all depends on who you ask. Point is she’s alive tonight in that woman and that’s the kind of energy that Carnival brings out. It’ll do the same for you if you let it.”

 “Let’s just say I’m waiting for the right moment,”

 “Maybe you’ll find that moment in a quieter place. Come on.” Tanice led him away from the streets and onto a secluded beach. They sat in the sand, listening to the sound of the waves.

 “When I was a girl, I used to spend hours walking the coastline, searching for washed up treasure.” Tanice curled her toes into the sand.

 “Like a pirate.” Jaden said, imagining her digging for buried treasure. The thought was entertaining.

 “Exactly like that. All I ever found were seashells and rocks though.”

 Tanice trailed off into silence and Jaden got the impression she was waiting for him to make a move. He looked at her lips, pictured what it would be like to kiss them, what it would be like to put his hands on her body and take her on the beach. Then he thought of Monique, of the dull pain that throbbed in his chest and he was suddenly unable to look beyond anything but the sorrow that swelled inside him like a tempest.

“Look…I’ve been meaning to tell you something.”

“About your divorce?” Tanice tilted her head. “You told me about it last night.”

 “Of course I did,” Jaden sighed, annoyed at himself for failing to remember.

“I wasn’t going to bring it up. We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want too.”

“No. It’s fine…I mean, no I’m not fine. What I’m trying to say is that I think you’re beautiful. There’s just a lot going on with me right now. I’m all over the place and I’m having a hard time thinking about anything else…”

Jaden’s mumbling was cut off by a kiss. It happened so quickly that his brain needed to catch up with what his body was experiencing. No. He wasn’t imagining it. Tanice’s lips were firmly on his. She tasted of strawberries. He stopped thinking.

Jaden wrapped an arm around Tanice’s waist and pulled her closer, breathing in the scent of her hair, her perfume, everything about her. He didn’t stop until they were rolling together in the sand, free of all cares.

When they were finished, they lay together a while and Jaden drifted into a deep, peaceful sleep. He woke in the morning light to find that she was still with him, naked and goddess-like.

  “You’re looking at me strangely,” Tanice said.

  “Was just reminding myself that I didn’t dream the last few hours.” 

   “I can confirm this,” Tanice leaned in to peck his lips.

 Jaden kissed her back and then became conscious of his own nakedness. “Not that I’m complaining about what we did but exactly how private is this beach?”

 “No one’s watching us if that’s what you’re worried about. Relax.” Tanice sat up and stretched. She picked up her bra, shaking the sand out of it.

Jaden took her word for it but still felt a sense of relief in sliding his boxers on. While dressing, he mentally prepared himself to start the conversation that he’d seen in rom-coms and always thought was a massive cliché. Don’t be awkward. Don’t be awkward. “So, about last night…”

“It was fun,” Tanice said, tying her hair into a ponytail. “I’m guessing it’s what you needed after everything you’ve been through recently. Before we go any further let me say that you don’t have to worry about making any promises or start buying me flowers. In case you hadn’t already noticed, I’m the sort of person who likes living in the moment and I’m not looking for anything other than that. But I happen to like living in the moment with you and we should hang out again.”

  “Uh, yeah that works for me. Living in the moment it is.”

 “Good to know.” Tanice smiled and they headed back into town, stopping at a diner for a quick breakfast. After eating and swapping numbers, Tanice said she’d meet him again in the same place in the evening and she’d show him more of the island.

 Jaden returned to the apartment in the early afternoon. Calvin was standing on the balcony that overlooked the front door and let him in.

 “I’m guessing your date must’ve gone well.”

 “You could say that.”

 “Did you give her the old four-legged foxtrot?”

 “Unlike you I wasn’t born in 1907.”

  “You did! I can see it in your eyes. I’m so proud.” Calvin sniffed and wiped an imaginary tear from his cheek. “But seriously, how’re you feeling? Bet it feels good to finally get whatshername out of your system.”

Jaden couldn’t deny that he was feeling lighter than he had in a long time. He also recognised there was still a lot of work to be done. “I’m getting there.” He admitted. “I’m meeting Tanice again tonight, which is good.”

“I’m feeling there’s a but coming,” Calvin said.

“It’s a no-strings-attached sort of thing. Don’t get me wrong. I’m fine with it. I think it’s what I need right now. I’m just wondering where it’ll go.”

“You’re overthinking again. What you should be doing is enjoying the fact that you’re living every guy’s dream right now with a fine ass woman who’s not looking for any commitments. You owe it to yourself to make every second of it count.”

“Y’know, occasionally you do make a bit of sense.”

“I always make sense. You’re too stubborn to listen most of the time.”

                                                           *

At 7PM, when Jaden arrived outside the diner, Tanice was waiting for him. She dressed in shorts and a tank top but she might as well have been wearing a crown and ball gown for how poised she looked. They greeted each other with a hug. 

“Hope you’re ready to get some exercise in.” Tanice said.

“Sounds like a euphemism,”

“Maybe it is. Maybe it isn’t. Either way we’ve got a lot of walking to do so you better be able to keep up.”

“Lead the way.”

Through backstreets, alleyways and thoroughfares they travelled, gradually leaving the noise and lights of St James behind for open skies and lush greenery. Tanice strolled at a relaxed pace, giving no hints as to where they were going and Jaden didn’t think to ask. All his life he’d stuck to a plan. Get the right job. Marry at this age. None of it had brought him any happiness. Stepping into the unknown was the only way to move forward.

  Eventually, they reached a large mass of trees that formed the entrance to woodland. “We’re almost there,” Tanice said. “By the way, how do you feel about walking through a haunted forest?”

 Jaden raised his eyebrows. “Can’t say I’ve ever had the urge to do it.”

Tanice smiled in that mysterious way of hers. “They call this place Spirit’s Wood. Remember when I told you about La Diablesse? Stories say this is where she’s been seen the most out of anywhere else on the island. She roams the forest, looking for her next victim to steal away into the night.”

  “It’s a good thing I don’t believe in ghosts then.” Jaden quipped.

 “Let’s hope she’s not around to hear you say that,” Tanice winked, striding along a dirt path, going deeper into the vegetation.

Silence hung in the air. Far away from the city, it became even more noticeable. Nothing in the forest stirred. There were no animal sounds or wind sweeping through the leaves. Shadows creeped across gnarled branches, casting sinister shapes to trail on the floor in the fading light of the moon. Jaden could see why Spirit’s Wood had earned its reputation.

Soon, he heard rushing water and the trees parted to reveal a giant waterfall, smashing into a pool so dark that it looked black.

 “Here we are,” Tanice announced. “You could call this my secret retreat.”

  “It’s beautiful,” Jaden said, in awe of the power that nature provided.

“Feels even better.” Tanice stripped out of all her clothes and dived into the water. When she came to the surface, she floated in the centre of the pool. “Are you coming in?”

Jaden undressed and waded into the pool, conscious of the temperature. He was hit with a cold sensation that banished the humidity. After taking a moment to let the cold cut through him, Jaden swam towards her. “Two nights with you and I’ve turned into a full-on nudist.”

“Clothes are overrated. We come into the world naked and we might as well leave the same way.”

“Interesting motto. You should put it on a t-shirt,” Jaden joked, feeling for her waist beneath the water.

“It’s more like a way of life. Leaping into the unknown. Even if you don’t know what’s going to happen you dive in with both feet. If I asked you to close your eyes right now, would you do it for me?” Tanice leaned in, kissing his neck.

 Jaden tilted his head, deciding to humour her. “I mean I’ve come this far. I don’t mind playing a little peek-a-boo.”

  “Keep your eyes closed until I tell you. It’ll be worth it.” Jaden felt the heat of her lips on his skin, heard her voice in his ear, soft and sultry. He did as she asked.

“When I first saw you, I didn’t think you were the type to throw caution to the wind. Coming out here…well, you proved me wrong.” Tanice wrapped her legs around him. The grip was strong. Much stronger than he expected. “It’s freeing, isn’t it? That moment when you stop being afraid of living your life. It makes you feel like you can conquer anything. I had that moment a long time ago and I’ve not looked back since.”

 Fingers dug into Jaden’s shoulder, sharp and demanding. A ripple of pleasure surged through him. “Are you going to look back? Are you going to keep living in the past?” There was a seductive power in her words. It made her voice sound deeper. “Or are you going to live in the present and be the man you were always meant to be?”

 “I’m going to live in the present,” Jaden grunted, burying his face into her neck to inhale her scent.

“Stepping outside of your comfort zone takes bravery. And you were brave to travel with me even though I warned you of the dangers of this place. You’re a trusting person. You’re also very naïve.”

  Playing along with her game was fun, up to a certain point. But a feeling of anxiety suddenly flashed in Jaden’s gut. A primitive reaction that forced him to open his eyes. Tanice was deathly pale, half of her face rotting away to reveal the bone underneath. She touched his cheek, long talons scraping against his skin.

“Here’s the thing about the unknown. Sometimes, it’s as scary as you think it’ll be.”